


This is not what they taught us in health class

by Ravendale



Category: Riverdale (TV 2017)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, archie pining over ronnie, arhieronnie, bodyswap au, varchie
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-07-04
Updated: 2018-07-04
Packaged: 2019-06-05 06:19:54
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15164513
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ravendale/pseuds/Ravendale
Summary: Archie and Veronica end up in the other's body and handle it pretty wellORI get sent some unusual requests and just go with it





	This is not what they taught us in health class

**Author's Note:**

> This is set during 1x03, specifically the scene where Veronica goes to confront Chuck.

“I mean it, Andrews, hit the showers and stay out of my way.”

Suffice to say Archie was not expecting that, in fact, he wasn’t expecting Veronica to be anywhere near the boys' bathroom. Especially with a face full of rage. 

Before he could open his mouth to reply he was shoved out of her way as she moved like lightning past him, he pitied the target of her fury. But when he found out what had happened he mentally applauded her for getting Chuck kicked off the team.

However, at that moment only one thought dominated his mind: Veronica Lodge had bumped into his practically naked body. And his body… reacted.

As much as he hated them, a cold shower was in order.

Scrubbing off the grime that inevitably clung to one’s body when you were in the boys’ bathroom, he felt the tension disappearing and his thoughts once again wandered to Ronnie. Ronnie who was his friend, Ronnie who he couldn’t be with because she said so. Ronnie who he kissed and who crumbled every preconceived belief he had about what a kiss was supposed to feel like. Ronnie, the girl with whom he shared a kiss that broke his best friend’s heart. Or was that him? He didn’t mean to, really! But he couldn’t lie, he couldn’t –especially after that kiss- tell her what she wanted to hear.

He scrubbed harder, his skin taking a shade of red. 

“Stupid,” he muttered, hitting the faucet with the side of his fist.

Almost instantaneously he wished he had hit his head against the faucet instead, realising that Veronica may have seen his manhood and felt the heat rushing to his cheeks.

He wasn’t a religious person, but an agonised “Oh my God,” escaped his lips as he facepalmed. He was sure she hadn’t even paid attention, she was visibly preoccupied with other thoughts but still. 

Archie ran her hand through his hair, contemplating if he would pay attention if the roles were reversed.

Who was he kidding, he didn’t need to think about it, if Veronica Lodge bumped into him naked spare for a towel he would definitely pay attention.

And then because luck wasn’t on his side his thoughts drifted to what Veronica Lodge would look like in the shower, nothing but her signature strand of pearls accompanying her body. He thought about the curve of her spine, and the curve of… other things. He imagined how her body would feel against his, probably a little warm and a whole lot luxurious. He wondered how it would feel to run his fingers through her hair and leave butterfly kisses along her jawline. He thought about how it would feel to-

“Andrews it’s been 10 minutes, get out of the fucking shower!” Reggie shouted, banging on the shower door.

Well, that was one way to sort out the problem that had resurfaced. The downside was that the banging startled Archie so much so that he moved too quickly and hit his head against the wall. 

What a terrible day to be Archie Andrews.

Archie woke up in a bed that felt way too expensive to be his own and in what felt like a silk shirt which made zero sense because he always slept shirtless – he easily got hot flushes and after a while just turned it into a habit. 

“Are you okay Mija?”

What the hell was Mrs Lodge doing in his room? Why was she calling him Mija? Steadily Archie looked around, this was not his room. But only when he looked down, give him a break he had just woken up, he realised that something was very wrong. 

This was definitely not his body.

“Veronica?”

It hit him like a ton of bricks and he didn’t know whether to laugh or cry. He was in Veronica Lodge’s body. What the fuck?

“Yes, I’m fine, just a migraine,” he said, in a voice too high to be Ronnie’s or any human’s for that matter.

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, what happened?”

“Betty said you weren’t feeling well so you came home to reset, why do you ask?”

“Nothing, I think I need some fresh air.”

“Okay, well I’m going to the site, Fred wants to talk about the designs. If you need anything, ask Smithers.”

WHAT THE HELL WHAT THE HELL WHAT THE HELL WHAT THE HELL WHAT THE HELL WHAT THE HELL WHAT THE HELL WHAT THE HELL.

Archie spent the next 20 minutes trying to figure out how he entered the twilight zone, and why. His thoughts were spiralling and he figured the best thing to do was find Veronica, or himself – Veronica in himself?

He tried his hardest not to let his hands (her hands?) linger on Veronica’s body as he got dressed- he took the safest option a black dress and flats. 

Smithers drove him to his house and after informing Archie that he’d pick her up when she let him know she was done. Archie continuously had to stop himself from asking which ‘Ms’ Smithers was referring to – this was all very confusing.

He knocked twice before he was pulled into his house, by himself.

“Archie is that you?” his body questioned.

“Yes, why are you whispering?”

His eyes rolled themselves at him. This was so weird.

“Veronica?”

“I’d say in the flesh but that’s a bit too Lucilius for me.”

“Do you know how this happened?”

“Not a clue, what I do know though is that this is borderline, no not borderline this is impossible. So it’s probably a dream, one of those hyper-realistic dreams when you’re aware you’re dreaming.”

“So what do we do till one of us wakes up?”

“Well, we just go with it but first,” she started.

One minute she was speaking and the next Archie was kissing himself. It was fucking weird, in a good way.

“Always wanted to do that, not bad.”

“You’ve kissed me before,” Archie deadpanned.

“I was talking about myself.”

“Oh.”

“So, Archiekins, what am I going to be doing today?”

“I have to, well you, uh my body has to be at Josie and The Pussycats performance tonight – but I’m grounded so my dad can’t see Archie there. You?”

“Revenge on Chuck Clayton.”

After Veronica had explained the plan to Archie he couldn’t say he felt very confident.

“You want me, to seduce Chuck? I can’t seduce. I’m not the seducer, I’m the seducee.”

“That isn’t a word, also you seduced me.”

Archie felt the body -that wasn’t his own- respond, the ends of Veronica’s ears warming.

“That was an accident, I was mesmerised by the cape! I don’t have it in me to be seductive.”

“Lucky for you then that my body will be doing all the work, all you have to do is move it around and say words.”

“Quick question: how do I put on your bathing suit?”

“I give you consent to undress my body and put on my bathing suit, do not exploit this privilege I would know.”

“Ronnie I would never, I swear – I won’t –“

“Relax Loverboy, I trust you.”

Archie was about to leave when Veronica called him back.

“Yes?”

“Your song about the raven-haired girl who tasted like ecstasy is my favourite,” she told him. That was the first time Archie saw a devilish smirk on his face.

“Ronnie!”

And with that, she closed the door.

**Author's Note:**

> thank you for reading this, I hope you like it! If you did kudos and comments are always appreciated <3
> 
> love.


End file.
